Seeing God Everyday

The other day I had a conversation with a young mother and asked if she was going to have any more children. She then went on to say that if she could be a "stay at home Mom" she might, but as long as she had to work she didn't think so. This brought up a whole set of emotions inside me. As I have talked about before my parents were both school teachers. When we were too young to go to school we were with a babysitter, then after we went to school we were alone a little while before they got home. When I was a young mother I tried to work. I had my degree and a teacher certificate, but I realized that I wasn't that fond of other people's children. So when I was pregnant with my third child I officially became unemployed. Now that I'm in my fifties I wish that I had pursued a career. Gotten up every morning, put makeup on, did my hair and got paid for doing something I loved to do. Back in the olden days the Prophets encouraged mothers to stay home and take care of their kids and not have a job to buy extras. Anyway, that is a whole different discussion. I know there are some Super Moms who can work, keep their houses spotless, cook delicious and healthy meals, but I wasn't one of them. I was lucky to get a shower and put deodorant on everyday when I had four kids under the age of seven. I have often wondered how my life would have been different if I had pursued a life out in the work force. Sometimes I feel really resentful that my husband always did what he wanted to do. He had the freedom to come and go as he pleased because I was a "stay at home Mom." I felt dependent on him for everything I had. The food I ate, the water I bathed in the bed I slept in. It kind of made me a recluse. Then when you add the anxiety and depression that followed my miscarriage it hasn't been that fun. I bought a book that Oprah suggested called, "Women Food and God", by Geneen Roth. I have just gotten through chapter four but I can relate to the women she talks about in her book. A couple of quotes from the book are, "How you spend your days is how you spend your life." I know at times I feel like it's Groundhog Day, I do the same thing everyday. The same dishes, the same laundry, feed the same animals. She then goes on to say the singer Pearl Bailey said, "People see God every day; they just don't recognize Him." Instead of looking in the past and all the "could of, should of and would ofs", I need to just start trying to see God in everything I do, no matter how menial it seems to be and show gratitude for the air I breath and the life I live. I truly have been blessed to have the wonderful family and friends, but the testimony I have that my Heavenly Father knows me, and loves me and wants me to have joy is the greatest gift.