Good Friday

Being a member of the LDS Church we don't celebrate Good Friday like the other Christian religions. To me it has always just been a hard day because the kids were out of school and bugging me about who they could have over and where could they go. I'm living that life again through Mindi's kids. She does way better than I did being the Kool Aid Mom and her kids have been busy with friends all day long. It makes me sooooo tired watching her. This has been a hard week, but now a days all my weeks are hard. I'm just waiting to see what the next challenge will be. Rich and I were married on a Good Friday thirty four years ago, so it always seems like our anniversary around Easter. Our real anniversary is April 16, just after Tax Day, stupid move on our part. He has had a horrible week at work trying to finish a fitness club that HAS to open tomorrow. He's been getting up at 4:00 a.m. and leaving by 6:00 to get to the job. He hasn't been home before 8:00 p.m. all week. It must be weird not seeing your house in the daylight for a whole week. The later it gets the more depressed I become. I worry that he is killing himself. When he was younger he could do it without any problem, but as he has reached his 50's I have watched him walk in all hunched over, go straight to the bathroom to shower, maybe read a little bit of the paper and get in bed. Sometimes he has church meetings and then I really feel bad for him trying to stay awake during those. It's hard to complain about having too much work when there are so many people out of work. There was a time at the end of last year when we didn't know if we were going to be able to keep our house or pay our bills. Rich has mentioned how bad he feels for all the construction workers who are "flat starving to death." At times I feel guilty that I haven't worked during our marriage to help with the expenses. I tried to work until I had three kids and they hated going to the babysitter and I realized I couldn't do both, I wasn't a Supermom like my Mother was. When the Prophet came out and said that mothers should stay at home if it was possible, that was my answer. I do wish sometimes that I had been able to have a career, to go out and make money doing something I loved and was good at. I spent six years in college and never used my degree. I guess I used my education degree to teach my own kids, sometimes I didn't even do a good job at that. Anyway, here I sit on a Friday night alone having a pity party while my husband burns the midnight oil, it's another Good Friday come and gone, at least we are still together and have a home and family to share. Rich always says, "some days are diamonds and some are stones," I'm waiting for that diamond day to come along.