Sunday, January 10, 2010

Sundays are Hard

Why are Sundays so hard? Sometimes I think Sundays are busier than any other day of the week. I thought it was a "day of rest?" We changed church times to 9:00 a.m. and that is better than the 12:30 schedule, but that means up early to shower and get all the chores done before church. Rich has responsibilities that start at 6:00 a.m. some Sundays so he wakes me up when he gets in the shower. I can't wait until my bathroom is finished and we can move back in our master bedroom. I have been sad all day. I wonder why Sunday brings out the reflection of times past. I find myself being irritated, tired and grouchy most Sundays and the Broncos didn't even play today. We had a good lesson in Relief Society but sometimes the message tends to make me more depressed than when I went in. Why is that? We were talking about how we are literal daughters of God and how we need to remember that everyday, and try and be more like him. That isn't a new concept for me but at times I feel my attitude doesn't emulate deity. I know we have to experience sorrow, pain, disappointment and death while on this earth but I don't have to like it do I? As a mother and grandmother I want to be an example to my children and grandchildren, but at times I feel like I'm just another problem for them instead of a solution. I think we always hope that after the holidays, when we start a new year that things will be better. I have hope that life will get better this year than last and I will be able to change the things about me that I hate. But, changing is hard for me. Trying to diet, exercise, read my scriptures, become more spiritual, be kinder to my family and friends, and all the other things that are asked of me are overwhelming. I know I have it really good. We always hear stories of how bad others have it and that puts me on the guilt trip too. I have so much to be thankful for and I feel ashamed that I can't see all the good around me sometimes. Maybe it is normal to have a down day. Maybe I need to just go to bed and hope that the sun will come up tomorrow and my mood will be better. Tomorrow will be a better day because Mondays aren't as stressful as Sundays.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Teri I wish you could see the inspiration you are to so many people, I love you just the way you are, and I hope you never change. It is ok to have "bad" days and feel depressed or down, as long as you remember you are never defeated. Tomorrow is a new day and you are in charge of your own destiny. I love you

Lis said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lis said...

Amen, I too sometimes feel overwhelmed on Sundays. Between getting everyone ready for church and out the door. Our goal this year is to be more on time to church. And make sure I have everything together for our primary lessons or sharing times. There are Sundays that leave me feel exhausted. But blessed as I am trying to engage in my callings and learn from these experiences. You know, the only thing I feel like I am learning though is to be patient. :) It's hard but you seem to be doing good. love ya!