"The Uses of Adversity"

I have spent most of the last two weeks riding in the car going from Goodwill to Hobby Lobby, JoAnns's and several other stores, trying to get costumes for Mindi's kids. By Sat. I was so tired I didn't even want to go to the ward party. Not to mention wanting to avoid some people who have disappointed me and made me lose respect for them. Anyway, I never have liked Halloween. As a young mother I was so glad when the calender turned to November and the Trick or Treat candy was gone and I could put all the scary decorations away and bring out the pilgrims and fall leaves. As I spent most of yesterday in a bad mood and stupor of thought, I woke up today with the thought I need to make changes in my life. I don't know how I will accomplish it, but hopefully I can get myself out of the mess I'm in and find a more healthy place emotionally and physically to live. In my almost sixty years I've had some hard trials. While raising my kids I felt overwhelmed and out of control most of the time. I spent many years going from doctor to doctor trying to find a cure for some of my symptoms. I had surgeries and tests run but finally just gave up and realized this was going to be my life. After Kamber drowned I felt a shift in my energy and my spirit. How could I go on after the tragic loss of that innocent child? I prayed a lot and read eveything I could, to try and make sense of my feelings. I was given a book called the "The Uses of Adversity," by Carlfred Broderick. At the end of the book he says, "My witness to you, is that God lives, and he does not live less though you have injustice and adversity and pain and unkindness and violence and betrayal. God is in his heaven. We chose to come to an unjust world and suffer. But God is God, and he loves us. His son died for us. There is for each of us, because of who we are and who he is and who we are together, hope. There is hope." So eventhough life gets overwhelming and dissapointing and hurtful, there is hope, that's all I have right now.