Tuesday, August 21, 2012

"Truth, Forgivness, and Self-Love"

I have talked a lot about how my Dad and I didn't get along that well while I was growing up. It has caused some real problems for me in relationships in my family, especially my husband. My grandfather died when my Dad was three days old. He was raised by his Mom and alcoholic step-father and had a very sad life living in poverty with no love and support. My husband was adopted by his step-father and was raised in a family where alcohol was a problem also. As I have done some counseling to get over some of my issues, I realize how important it is when raising children that we have good relationships with them and show how much they are loved and wanted. I struggle everyday with low self-esteem, depression, grief, sorrow and many other emotions that get in the way of feeling joy in this life. Last night as Rich and I were talking about some of our family issues, we can see the "sins of the Fathers" passed on from generations to generations. I have heard my Dad tell me several times how he wished he could go back and raise me again. He would do better, now that he knows the damage, he's sorry. I reflected on my own life and how I wish I could go back, take a deep breath and start all over again. I would change so many things in my life and how I acted, the way I treated people, the mistakes I made. As I finished the book "The Mastery of Love", he talks about how to heal our emotional lives, he says, "three simple points: the truth, forgiveness, and self-love." Life is always going to be hard in some aspects, that's why we are here, so until I'm called home I will be working on changing those things about me that are keeping me from that "Heaven on Earth" where I wish I lived.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I think we all wish we could have a "do over" I don't know anyone except maybe Eric's mom who was a perfect parent. We all have things we could do better at. I can totally relate to this post, but I also know if we do not forgive, the only one it is hurting is ourselves.