6 More Days

I thought I knew what Hell was when Kamber went back to Heaven. I guess there are many different types. We must have to make several trips through Hell to make sure that we do not want to end up there when we die. This hip thing is the Hell that I'm going through at this time. I told Mindi this morning that I can't spend one more day in bed. I'm losing what little brain cells I have left moving from the bed to the chair to the couch. I haven't been able to sleep more than two or three hours in a row since my surgery and I know without sleep I'm a mess. I still have 27 staples in my butt that are a huge" thorn in my side" but I only have six more days until they come out. I tried begging them to take them out early but they "never take them out before three weeks."

I think the worst thing about this whole experience is not being able to do anything for myself. I have Mindi or Rich help me shower and get dressed and my parents have been great to come over and help me do my laundry and dishes. I absolutely hate having to use a walker to get around. Dragging it around on my wood floor and tile is like running your fingernails on a chalkboard. Hopefully I will be walking without it soon. All I can think about is how bad I feel for anyone who has to go through a joint replacement.

I know I sound really down, I have been in these dark places before and crawled out so eventually I hope to be back to normal and shopping at the Mall. It kills me that Dillards is having an extra 40% off and I can't go. I think I would be happy with a little trip to the Dairy Queen right now.

I have so many blessings I'm ashamed to complain about my life. The fact that technology has advanced to the place where my wonderful surgeon could fix me is such an incredible blessing.
I am also aware of the extremely hard trials others are going through, all I can do is talk about my thoughts and feelings. I have had so many friends and family who have come by to see me or called to check on me. I appreciate every act of kindness that has been rendered. I don't deserve it that's for sure.

I am sure this trial will pass and I will be grateful that I was able to survive it. I know that my life will be easier and I am still trying to convince myself that I can do hard things. Right now I am just looking for something to do to help pass the time. I miss sewing and shopping that is for sure but I know that I will be back at it in no time.