Confused and Discouraged

Rich has little sayings he has said since we've been married. One of them is "are you confused, discouraged and looking for something better." I guess that is what the missionaries used in the discussions in the 70's when he was in Canada. I have thought of that quote often these last few months as the lingering depression of Kamber's passing, the economy has gone to h*#, and everything in our lives has changed. I am confused, discouraged and looking for something better. It seems like as we age things begin to fall apart. Our bodies aren't looking so "hot" and sometimes we don't feel that great either. Instead of having four children to worry about, we have eight children and twelve grandchildren to fret over. Anyway, all those things are blessings, but with the blessings comes the stress. For the last thirty-three years I have tried to do all I can to make the lives of my family better. I cleaned, washed clothes, dishes, dogs, and anything else that needed it. Rich would go with the scouts or hunting or whatever and I stayed home. Sometimes I could have gone but I developed "agoraphobia" after the loss of a pregnancy. So by choice I've stayed home in my little world. Anyway, I'm going out on a limb and leaving for Salt Lake in the morning. I'm taking a little trip, riding with my sister Mell and her husband Larry. I am afraid to fly so they have been kind enough to take the "slow boat to China" route. Rich will fly up Thursday afternoon and we will see family, shop and attend his missionary reunion with Elder Ballard on Friday evening. Then we will start our trip home on Saturday. Mindi has been kind enough to volunteer, (Ha, Ha,) to feed the animals, water the plants and keep our house safe. We appreciate her so much. She does so much service for us and all of our family. I know that by being the oldest she has been dumped on lots, but we love her and are so grateful that she is our daughter. Candi came over this week and cut all our hair and made us beautiful for at least the next couple of weeks. We love and appreciate her service too. I have the best kids. I know everyone thinks they do, but I'm sorry mine are the best. I hope we have a safe trip, say a prayer for me because I need all the help I can get.