"Death Is Merciful"

Yesterday I was sad all day long. I couldn't put my finger on what was bothering me. Was it "jet lag" from spending a week in the car with four small children? Was it disappointment in myself in the way I look and feel? Was it hoping that life was different and better than it is? I thought about Kamber all day long knowing that in ten short days it would be her birthday. Anyway, I watched a little t.v. took a long hot bath and was going to bed around 9:45 when the phone rang. I didn't recognize the voice but she seemed upset and wanted to talk to Richard. There are only a few people who call my husband Richard and they all live in Utah, plus it was an 801 area code, so I knew it was a call from someone up there. All I heard on the phone was a sad tone and him asking what he could do to help. When he hang up and I asked him who it was on the phone, he told me it was his sister and that his Mom had passed away. We are in shock, even though she has suffered from Parkinson's disease for a long time, we were hoping that she was doing well. On Sunday I told Rich that we needed to call his Mom and see how she was, it had been a while. We had a crazy busy day with ward conference, home teachers and dinner. Anyway, we never did make the call, and now that opportunity to visit with her is lost forever. As I said yesterday, each day is a gift and it is what we make of it that counts. I don't know what the funeral arrangements are now, I am hoping that most of our family can travel the twelve hours to Salt Lake City to be with our extended family who live up there. I remember when my Grandma Slade passed away I was so upset. She was 86 years old and spent most of her time in bed. As I was crying at her funeral my Dad said, "Teri, in lots of cases, death is merciful." I've never forgotten that. I know Grandma Beth has suffered so much with the illness she had to bare. I hope she is pain free and at peace, we love her and will miss her until we see her again on the other side.