Monday, October 6, 2014

"His Mercy is the Mighty Healer"

The weekend went by way to fast and now we are enjoying the kids home for Fall Break. It has actually been really nice to have them home to help me a little bit. By 8:00 a.m. I already had the animals fed and my aquariums cleaned out. When you have three boys to help, it sure is easier. It seems like listening to Conference makes me have a let down every time. I enjoy listening to the words of wisdom but at some point it does make me feel like I'm sure not hitting the mark most of the time. If I could understand one Gospel principle better it would be the Atonement. I still can't comprehend how the Savior can make everything better. I have struggled for a long time with feelings of not being good enough and some family members make sure they remind me often. Sometimes when I feel like I've had enough, I still don't know how to repent, forgive, and move on. When I heard President Packer say, "HIS mercy is the mighty healer," I wondered why the death of Kamber is still so painful. The hole in my heart hasn't been repaired and probably never will. Last night as I struggled to fall asleep I heard a voice that said, "Just do the best you can and that's good enough." Maybe that was just a thought that went in to my mind but after that I fell asleep for a few hours. One thing I did learn from the talks is that this mortal life wasn't suppose to be easy and we shouted for joy when we heard we were coming down to get our body and be tested. Sometimes I wonder why I was so excited for that, living in this mortal body hasn't been a cake walk for me. Anyway, the sun will come up tomorrow and my quilts will still be there to work on. I also have two birthdays and a baptism this week, so I need to get myself together and have hope for the future.

No comments: