Emotional Week

I can't believe another week has passed by. Life is turning into a whirlwind for us. We had Kamber's birthday celebration on Tues., a ward Valentine dinner last night, Trace's baptism today and we just got home from a dear friend's 65th birthday party. I have spent the most part of the last two weeks trying to clean house, decorate, and finish projects to prepare for this week. As I was sitting in the car with Troy on Fri. morning while Mindi ran in to Hobby Lobby I started having really bad anxiety. I felt totally overwhelmed with what was asked of me. I was to host 4-5 couples in my home for a ward party. I was having the whole family over for a luncheon after Trace's baptism. How could I possibly do that? I was feeling really bad about losing Kamber and not being able to come to grips with that loss. I have heard that when you start feeling that pressure, to start writing down all your blessings. So, I grabbed my purse and found a small slip of paper and started listing all the things I was grateful for. After writing down about 20 things on my paper I started feeling a little better. It took my mind off all the worries I had and I concentrated on the positive things going on in my life. I do have so many blessings. I have been told that I am a negative person, that I only see the bad in every situation. We had a great day today. I felt the spirit really strong. But I also felt the missing child that wasn't there with our family. I hope time will heal this hole in my heart.