"Count Your Blessings"

I  just got a call from Spencer wanting to know why we are still in the 100"s. I told him I didn't know, but I sure wish I could get out of here for awhile. Where would I go if I could go anywhere in the world? Hum, that would take a while to figure out. It seems like the closer I get to sixty years old the more the "light" has come on. I sometimes feel like I'm becoming my parents and the things I find myself saying are those same words that have been told me all my life. When I was young and dumb, I cared so much about my friends. I didn't treat my sister very well, she was too smart, played the piano, and was too obedient, not cool. I was between the oldest perfect sister and the golden child brother. Where did I fit in? I remember my Aunt Tenna telling me that friends were good, but the only people that will be there in the end for you is your family. It's taken me all these years to figure that one out. Yesterday all the kids and grand kids came over for dinner except the Boston Larsens. While talking to Spencer and hearing him say how beautiful it is back East with the leaves turning all shades of yellow, orange and red, I became so sad. I miss them so much. After telling him my struggles with pain, disappointment and sadness he assured me that everyone has problems. "Count your blessings, name them one by one," I shouldn't have to keep reminding myself that I have more than I deserve. It was fun watching the kids jump on the trampoline and glide down the zipline, but there are some missing, the saddest one being Kamber. As Troy went out the door this morning he was brimming with smiles. It's his birthday today and when I asked him how old he was, he answered "six" it made me realize that Kamber would be six too. She will be forever two in my head. Life is hard, and it's not fair, that continues to be my motto.