Saturday, November 1, 2008

The Light



I know the weather doesn't feel like fall, but we are officially out of October and in to November. I was putting all of my witches and skeletons away this morning and bringing out all the fall leaves, scarecrows and pilgrims. I felt a deep feeling of gratitude. I'm not very good at showing and telling my family of my deep appreciation for all they do for me, but I certainly feel it. I am reading a book called "Closer to the Light." It is about a pediatrician who had some amazing experiences with sick children who had near death experiences. At times the book talks about how scientists try to explain away the things these children see. They think that the brain makes them believe what they saw and that it didn't actually happen the way they remembered it. Sometimes they say they saw Jesus while others say they saw a Grandma or Grandpa who had passed away earlier. Almost all of them say they see a "Light." We believe the "light" to represent the Savior. When Kamber passed away I was in shock. I kept pounding on the wall down my hall and saying, "Why us?" It didn't make any sense to me. Then all of a sudden I got this thought, "Why not us?" We see things in the newspaper and on t.v. all the time about tragic things that happen and you never really think it will happen to your family. When it does, you feel really unprepared to survive what is being asked of you. I hope at some point in our lives we will be able to look back and see how much we grew spiritually and how much stronger we became; but right now it seems to be a pretty high price to pay.

4 comments:

Mindi said...

I am proud of you for doing a blog even though you sit and cry the whole time. I do think it is therapeutic and even though I talk to you everyday I learn a lot from your posts. Stay strong and think about what you always say to me. "Cheer up, it could be worse."

Flip flop Queen! said...

I'm gald you have a blog! You will find that you will get some joy from writing your feelings and definitely when you are sad it will let some of the frustration out. You are strong and I know you can make it through this trial, that's why we have family!
Lots of Love,
Jen

Alishia said...

I have definitely seen the strengthening of your family. Your kids have been truly amazing!They have come together to help each other in a way that makes me envious! I've never seen anything like it.

Your strength has also been an example to me. You have grown in so many ways through this horrific trial! There is no doubt in my mind that you have all been blessed with the gift of the Holy Ghost to comfort and help.

I know that things seem hopeless and lonely a lot of the time, but don't give up. Your family will be together again before you know it! Remember that you are still thought of every day and prayed for every day. We love you!!

keepingupwiththewootans said...

Mom, you are doing such a good job on your blog. I do know that feeling of why us? Why Ethan and Jenn? It is not fair. There has been good things that have happened to our family because of or love for Kamber and I really think I have realized that we dont know when we will be called home. Your an awesome grandma. Tons and tons of fun to be around. We love you! Candi