Today is my firstborn daughter Mindi's 39th birthday. How is it possible that I have a child that old? She is a wonderful person who puts the needs of everyone before herself. Being the oldest she worked really hard to keep the other kids out of trouble and now she's doing the same thing for her own children. When I got sick and couldn't cope with life, it put lots of responsibility on her and I don't know many daughters that would do what she has done for me. I will forever be grateful for her and know she will be blessed for her efforts. Last week someone close to me said, "No one is going to come rescue you." That has played over and over in my mind as I have tried to figure out what exactly was meant by that. I have to agree that as a young girl I had visions of someone on a white horse coming to save me, but I gave up on that idea a long time ago. Life is hard and as I get older and the body starts breaking down a little bit everyday, I realize that the only thing I really have is my testimony of the Savior and my belief that when I die it's not the end. After talking to a friend about some of my concerns he asked if I believed in Agency. Of course I believe, we fought the war in heaven for the right to choose between good and evil. What about the Atonement, do you believe in that? I wish when I was young and when I raised my kids that I really understood what that means. I guess it's time to let a lot of those old demons go, and I realize that everyone has their agency to do what they want and hopefully rely on the Savior to take care of the things we do wrong. Hopefully this doesn't sound to preachy, it's just been on my mind all week so I thought I would write it down.
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